Less than a week...

Assalamualaikum,

i. Internet Breakdown & "Shades of Green" Mini Gathering

Alhamdulillah, setelah genap 4 hari hidup umpama backpackers, the wireless broadband internet di rumah #60 kembali berfungsi. Syukur alhamdulillah. We started realizing the malfunction of the broadband di pagi Isnin, 6/7/09 when we all received the same message pada muka pertama website, informing that there might be a connection problem.

Since that very day was the planned mini "shades of green" gathering at 3 burn street and the sun was showing itself happily that morning plus remembering that we haven't got the fire starter yet for the bbq set, Kam and myself happily walked and experience two different paths, one to get to the Co-op shop and another one for going back to Steavenson St. It was a happy day but bits of happiness were torn away when it started to rain that afternoon and the bbq was cancelled and the chicken all went to the oven for cooking.

However, the event went on as planned. Us the residents of #60 went earlier so that we could get connected with the internet a.s.a.p at around 4pm while the gathering actually starts at 6pm. Volunteered myself to prepare the table, helping with the decos and preparing the food. Alhamdulillah by the time the first guest: K.Zila arrived, everything's ready and then I happily took the opportunity to browse the internet, check emails, check blogs, check my farm (addicted to farm town facebook.. LOL), etc.. and when the 2nd guest: Yusran & wife arrived, we all had a photo session & it's time to eat. It was finger licking good! Seriously.. the combination of Nasi Minyak Amalina & Roast chicken by Dijah + Amalina.. it's hard to resist a second (ermm third, fourth even ;oP) round.. Also, really love the Karipap & Onde2 (ala2 putri mandi Brunei version) brought and made by Aisyah (Yusran's wife).

K.Nur, Lutfi & Rosmin arrived later than the rest and we all continued pampering ourselves with food and making full use of the internet at the same time. Regretably we forgot to take pictures when K.Nur was around becoz she went home early (tak salahkan her, she attended a summer course that morning and just came back by 5pm and went to Amalina's few hours after.. must be a tiring day for her) but we had fun taking various styles of photo sessions using 5 different cameras (correct me if I'm wrong) and finally before midnyte after cleaning up session went back home and continued playing Star Game (hmmm Double Win for me!! yipeeee)

Zeah & Nurul call me up that midnyte (it was 6++am 7th July in Brunei and they were in school) to wish "Happy Friendship Day". I really can't hide my sadness and disappoinment not being there with them to celebrate and tears naturally went down *sigh*. There was actually hesitation to play the game that night but thinking of the preparations for the game, I hold myself back together and finally, it was the best star game ever!! (so far hehehe)

Below are pictures before the event started (Us 4 testing out the "green effect" hehe) and picture with Lutfi & Rosmin (the best one yg ada in my camera.. whoppsss ertinya yg lain2 tu.. hmmm LOL):

ii. Kak Nur's Departure 080709 to M'sia

A day after the mini gathering, it's time to say goodbye, farewell & bon voyage to our dearest housemate cum sister, kak Nur. We apologize for not being able to send you off to Newcastle airport for your departure. I really2 want to but I guess some things can only planned tapi tidak dpt dilaksanakan.. Here's a picture of me and k.nur in our living room before K.Zarina fetch her.

Dearest kak Nur, sekiranya we are not going to meet again in Durham, Uk after this, I am with full honesty and frankly saying that I've never regret to have met you in Durham. You are one of a kind, you have become more to a sister than a friend after few months knowing you. Thanks for spending your time and lending your ears and eyes, sharing you room to hear my problems, to witness my tears. Sorry for not being there when you need me the most at times. I apologize and I'm so sorry that I've been struggling to understand you during your last few days in Durham. Wish that we have more time to understand each other again. However, thank you so much for sharing your friendship, thank you, thank you. Till we meet again my dearest Kak Nur. Just remember that you will never be forgotten. Missing you so much already! Enjoy yourself in Malaysia alongside getting your data gathering done. All the best. Take care!

iii. The Thank you(s) & Appreciation + Apologies

Just a short paragraph to thank Amalina for sharing her internet connection throughout the connection breakdown at ours. Thank you for letting us sleepover in your house last Wednesday the 8th. Plus sorry for breaking your "gayung".. insyaALLAH when I get to go shopping, will buy a new one for you. I feel so guilty for breaking it.

Also sending apologies to all those in my life. Who knows that the time will come soon enough way before we expect them to. Sorry if I've been so difficult to understand. I'm sorry for the "speed of light" change of moods, for being unfriendly at times, being so reserved most of the time, for any rudenss/cruelty that I might have done to you. I'm so sorry... SORRY my friends (=

iv. Kau Pergi Kerana Suka - Alif Satar OIAM

A song that I like.. tiada kena mengena dengan kehidupan pun.. =P

Kau kata akulah segalanya

Yang menyinar mekar di hatimu

Kau berjanji akulah satu-satunya

Yang abadi hingga ke ahkhirnya

Kau genggam erat tanganku

Kau sambut cinta suciku

Kau hias indah hidupku

Kau beri ku bahagia

Kau pergi dari ku

Sendiri tanpamu

Mana janji-janjimu untuk setia dengan ku

Hatiku terluka dibuai rindu padamu

Manakah setia yang kau ucap dulu

Maafkanku jika salahku

Hulur tanganmu sambut cintaku

Aku tak sanggup sendiri

Kembali kasih dalam hidupku

Cintaku tulus sejati

Kau pergi dariku

Sendiri tanpamu

Mana janji-janjimu untuk berdua denganku

Hatiku terluka dibuai rindu padamu

Manakah cinta yang kau ucap dulu

Cintamu bukan untukku

Alamak, terjiwang pulak.. hmmm

P/s: Doakan aku dapat meneruskan kehidupan ku ini, doakan aku masih menpunyai kekuatan untuk meneruskan kehidupan ini. Doakan segalanya akan berjalan seperti yang ku harapkan, insyaALLAH.

- If I'm no longer here with you, just remember that all of you have been and will always be the rainbow of my life - Nursyeffarni HS 10th July 2009 -

pp/s: I'm so confused with this blogger alignment thingy, sudah jua di edit but it still jadi cramped and ilang paragraph. I'll beginning to fell the tension editing for now. So, biar tia macam ani lah for now. As long as masih boleh di baca kan =)

Dedicated For Hazeah & Nurulbadariah

Assalamualaikum,

Another special blog post for two special person in my life:

Hazeah

and

Nurulbadariah

Whom I met different years of my university life in Brunei..

Hazeah, nama panggilan, Zeah, met in 2005 during MIB module n voted to be in the same presentation group. That was the start of the great, amazing, bombastic friendship bond, from friends to bestfriend to bestest friend.Nurulbadariah, nama panggilan Nurul, nama manja (current), Adriah.. (jangan marah~). One of the first friends I met during my undergrad 1st year in Brunei. Been in the same tutorial groups, my presentation partner-in-crime throughout the 4 yrs in UBD. We took the exact same modules and have become bestest friends eversince.

It was in 2006 when we started celebrating a special day to remind us of the special friendship we share and we chose a special date: 7th July every year since 2006 as our day but sadly, didn't have the chance to celebrate it this year (2009) *sigh*

Let me share with you our previous celebrations..

i. 7th July 2006 (1st F-Day)

Theme - Identical Baju Kurung design with different colours

Place - Seasons Restaurant, Gdg, Brunei

ii. 7th July 2007 (2nd F-Day)

Theme - Black & White Identical Skirt + White Top

Place - Muara Beach + Amsaara Restaurant Qlap

iii. 7th July 2008

Theme - Identical Black&Green striped Top (Day1)

and Identical Black Long Dress (Day2)

Place - Loughborough, UK

iv. 7th July 2009 (Missed our 4th F-Day)

-Missing in Action in Durham, uk-

To Zeah & Nurul, thanks for accepting me for who i am and have been. Thank you for being my friend. Hope our friendship will last forever & ever. Miss you both so much and wish you were here. There are not enough words to describe how much I am blessed & greatful that I found you both i my life. Take care always. Miss ing you both so much!

Lots of Love,

Arni in Bowburn, Durham

7th July 2009 (5.52pm uk time)

Dedicated for K.Nur =)

Assalamualaikum,

First and foremost, I'd like to apologize and please forgive me for my forgetful cramped with too-many-things-to-think-about mind that I missed wishing one of the greatest, bestest friend cum sister found/met in Durham 2008:

Kak Nur Fakhzan

a

"Happy Belated Birthday"

on the

4th of July 2009

p/s: I'm so sorry.. Maybe it's because you are far away from us makes my mind slipped the fact that a kind, beautiful, superb friend was celebrating her birthday. It's not that I forget you or the date of your birthday, it's just that I remembered a little bit later than I'm supposed to.

Especially For You Kak Nur:

Semoga di hari lahir mu kau rasa bahagia, semoga segala impian dan cita2 mu tercapai, semoga sentiasa diberkati oleh ALLAH s.w.t serta sentiasa di bawah lindunganNya jua, Amin. Semoga dipanjangkan umur, dimurahkan rezeki. All the best with your study. You can do it kak! Always remember that it's fated that we met in Durham and there will never be any feeling of regret that I've found you my friend cum sister. I'm surely gonna miss you. I'm praying for you K.Nur. Semoga ALLAH panjangkan umur kita berdua dan akan menemukan kita semula dimasa akan datang, insyaALLAH, AMIN.

Although we missed her birthday, the next day upon her arrival we plan a simple surprise birthday celebration in #60. Just a simple one, hope you like it k.nur ;oD

Lots of Love,

Nursyeff@rni H.S

Puasa Musim Summer

Salam,

# Puasa demi kesihatan

Hari ni hari kedua berpuasa. Semalam 1st time cuba2 untuk berpuasa time summer. Alhamdulillah terlaksana juga. InsyaALLAH akan diteruskan semampuku. Btw, berpuasa di musim summer ni byk betul dugaan. Especially bila diri dikelilingi ngan personal food kat dalam bilik.. hehe and tinggal di bilik tingkat bawah yg dekat dgn kitchen.. tu yg byk dugaan. So, kalau dah kurang termampu sikit tu aku bawak la rehat2, baring2 and took some nap now and then. I'll take this puasa session sebagai sebahagian cara untuk mengekalkan kesihatan diri serta as a practice for Ramadhan puasa in September. Lagipun, bukannya baru sedar tapi I've realized that semenjak aku dtg uk semula ni, berat badan semakin menjadi-jadi.. orang lain makin slim aku the opposite pulak.. haha.. tapi I'm not desperate la nak kuruskan secara drastik.. perlahan-lahan. Lagipun, I still look happy walaupun dah semakin tembam *ahaks* (Hopefully baju2 raya di Brunei maseh muat.. hehehe)

# Rindu pada dia dan kamu

It's been a while haven't called home sampai satu tahap yg tak ku sangka pun akan terjadi that my mom texted me asking why I didn't call her. She never acted that way before and I knew that she sensed that something must be wrong.. In fact, YES there is something wrong! But then, only some knew about it and to those who knew please, I beg you all jangan bagitau orang lain.. I'll open up when I feel that it's been settled and I think you all knew that aku memang jenis yg suka memendamkan perasaan dan masalah pada diri sendiri. Kalau I feel like I wanna share, only those selected will be told. Pada yg tidak diberitahu, jangan berkecil hati. That's just my nature.. That the real me that you have to live with.

Lately I can't deny that I miss everyone back home. Yes, every single one of them including my cats. I have to agree with what zeah told me on the phone few days back.. what I am going through now is the feeling of "being lonely BUT not alone". Yup Zeah, especially without you around! *sigh*. I don't know with you all but have you ever been in the situation where whenever you think of home, naturally the eyes went watery & at times crying would really help in reducing the feeling of missing home.. I've been in that situation too frequently lately and I think I know exactly what I need to do. So, dearest friends, do prepare for any sudden decision I made which might surprise you. I wanna be home and have the chance to visit my grandpa's graveyard & be present during his tahlil ceremonies. Be at home to accompany mom for sleepover with grandma next door. Honestly that's what I really feel doing right now. I MISS BRUNEI to bits!

# Mengapa kau pergi..?

Ya, mengapa? Mengapa kau pergi di kala aku masih memerlukan? Mengapa harus meninggalkan aku tanpa penjelasan? Tapi sekiranya pemergianmu itu membuatkan dirimu bahagia, aku turut gembira buatmu.. Pernahkan kamu wahai pembaca merasa sebegini? Seseorang pergi dari hidupmu tanpa relamu. Pergi tanpa menjelaskan apa2 padamu? Pergi.. Pergi begitu sahaja.. Tapi itu adalah pilihan mereka! Mengapa perlu sedih? Mengapa perlu marah? Mengapa perlu kecewa? Semua ini lumrah manusia yang mudah terasa dengan apa2 hal pun yg mempunyai kaitan dengan mereka.

Aku sendiri pernah dan seringkali berperasaan demikian tetapi aku seringkali mengingatkan diri ini dan juga mengingatkan teman2 bahawa setiap apa yang seorang individu itu lakukan ada mempunyai sebab tersendiri. They have their reasons for doing it. Same goes to me. Setiap langkah yang ku ambil, setiap jalan yang ku pilih ada sebab-sebab yang tertentu.. Aku tidak akan menghalang jalan yang kamu pilih wahai teman, sepertimana aku harap kamu tidak akan menghalang jalan yang aku pilih..

# Repacking kotak2 ku

Hari ini, walaupun cahaya matahari sungguh2 serupa sudah dengan chaya matahari di bumi Brunei. Aku sendiri bersetuju dengan status seorang teman di facebook baru2 ini yg menyatakan: "I can't tell the difference between UK weather and Brunei cuaca. Panaas!! " Jom teka2 whose status was this? Definitely not someone from Durham ;o) I'm not that sure but kata org it's the heatwave kah apa? Yg penting I won;t go out that much this week. Especially time posa2 ani and I wanna be close to my deskfan 24/7 as possible.

Anyway, out of no plan, I decided to rombak some of my boxes & repacked the things inside. I'm so worried. My things which are still to be use byk and I don;t know cukup atau inda the boxes tu nanti. That includes my printer, my chair, baju2, brg2 kan bawa balik for Raya etc. Sakit kepala aku! But it's fun "spring cleaning" my boxes hehehe.

# 5 Days left for....?

I can't believe that I'm gonna missed it this year.. You might be wondering what it is but I'll blog about it when the day comes. Surprise2.. tunggu.. ahaks

Nursyeff@rni in Bowburn